I'm currently working on an essay for a contest in Real Simple magazine, with the goal of winning $3,000, getting my essay published, and getting a trip for two to New York City. The theme is your life's greatest regret or something you really wish you had done differently. Without giving away the farm, I am writing about my tendency to believe that I know much more than I actually do, and the resulting lack of receptivity to feedback, and not paying attention to new information. My social work career has humbled me greatly in this area, and I realize most people probably do this at least some of the time, but it's something I want to improve and be on the watch for. (Keep reading, there's more)
Friday, July 27, 2012
Why yes, as a matter of fact it IS all about me
In keeping with the sentiment of yesterday's two posts (immaturity/jealousy/self-centered-ness):
Hey, if you like what you read here, please feel free to become a member or a follower - I only have a few at present (two of whom are my husband and me), but we are closing in on 1,000 visits (not bad for a recent, un-well-publicized blog, I think), so lots of folks out there are reading and I can't help thinking that beefing up official readership will beget more new readers, who I hope will find something helpful, encouraging, and/or funny - because let's just put it out there, I am hilarious. Also feel free to post a link on
your own blog or facebook page - I'm
happy to do the same for you.
And above all, thanks so much for reading!
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Colorado and Shameless Self-Promotion
I am struggling to write something that is not trite and/or
cliché-ridden, if that’s not redundant, about the shooting last week in Aurora,
Colorado. It is a struggle I am losing, but maybe after things calm down and
some details are sorted out, I can come up with something appropriate. In the
meantime, I will do one of the things I (and many others, I’m sure) do best: I
will connect myself to it in a superficial way, as a means of trying to
understand and/or shift the conversation so it is about me. J So here goes:
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Recent Happenings
(Photo quality? Not so great. Moment captured? One of the best ever - David toddling about) (also, hanging out in the world's least coordinated set of pajamas)
First swim of the season for all 3 boys (I was photographer & official spectator)
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Other Good Things
(1) David had a follow-up hearing test this week, in the Speech & Language program/center of the university I attended for my undergraduate degree, which is about ½ hour away from our town. David screamed so loudly when they put the probe-thing in his ear that I really don’t know how the examiner was able to get any results, but she was satisfied and said there are no major changes since his last test. David appears to have a very mild (but permanent) hearing loss, but there have been no recommendations for hearing aids or any other intervention, just the recommendation that we speak clearly/a little loudly and keep background noise to a minimum. That’s probably good advice for most kids, right? She wants to test him again in another 6 – 8 months, but she really didn’t seem too concerned about anything. It was also nice to visit the building where all my social work classes were held - I changed David's diaper in the same bathroom I visited often as a student - it was a nice life check-in moment, to consider how different life is now, from the way it was then.
(2) David’s speech therapist visited today, I usually enjoy talking with her and today I shared with her about my recent pregnancy loss (see “Pajamas” below). Her response was really about as perfect as it could have been – gentle and empathic and sweet. She talked a little about grief/loss/life challenges in general, and having faith things will get better. Her specific metaphor was believing that morning will come, but realizing you have to sit through a lot of darkness first. She also talked about thinking about challenging times in her life as “Saturdays,” and explained she meant Holy Saturday, the day between Good Friday and Easter. She talked about Jesus’ disciples, and how although Jesus had told them a million times that he would rise from the dead, they still didn’t believe it or understand it. And how could you understand it, really? When you’ve never known anything like it, it’d be hard to comprehend the amazing thing that was coming. So on Holy Saturday, they were just sitting around, sad and afraid and shocked … so, not to over-analyze here, but each time I think about this, I come up with a different little layer of meaning. A good metaphor. … it occurred to me later that this might be her standard “don’t give up" speech (goodness knows that in my work [clinical social work] I have a number of prepared responses for various situations) that she may’ve given to 50 other clients, but even if that’s the case, I still liked it and was glad for the mutual sharing.
(I'm sure the therapist is mindful of the church-state separation issue, which is also very important to me, but she knows Matt is a pastor so she probably feels a little freer (is that right? free-er?) to discuss).
(3) Good and bad: David has been sleeping in Simon’s old toddler bed for about two weeks now. It has actually gone really well; he’s only fallen out a few times and he seems to get a good night’s rest. That’s the good. The bad: thinking about this reminds me of another not-pregnant item: one other thing I can cross off my list is that I no longer have to check the bulletin board at the grocery store, where there was an ad (with little tear-off phone number tabs) for a fixed-side crib. Simon had a 2nd-hand drop-side crib but since he used it they’ve stopped manufacturing them and strongly recommend against using them, so I was hoping to score a good deal on the safer version.
(2) David’s speech therapist visited today, I usually enjoy talking with her and today I shared with her about my recent pregnancy loss (see “Pajamas” below). Her response was really about as perfect as it could have been – gentle and empathic and sweet. She talked a little about grief/loss/life challenges in general, and having faith things will get better. Her specific metaphor was believing that morning will come, but realizing you have to sit through a lot of darkness first. She also talked about thinking about challenging times in her life as “Saturdays,” and explained she meant Holy Saturday, the day between Good Friday and Easter. She talked about Jesus’ disciples, and how although Jesus had told them a million times that he would rise from the dead, they still didn’t believe it or understand it. And how could you understand it, really? When you’ve never known anything like it, it’d be hard to comprehend the amazing thing that was coming. So on Holy Saturday, they were just sitting around, sad and afraid and shocked … so, not to over-analyze here, but each time I think about this, I come up with a different little layer of meaning. A good metaphor. … it occurred to me later that this might be her standard “don’t give up" speech (goodness knows that in my work [clinical social work] I have a number of prepared responses for various situations) that she may’ve given to 50 other clients, but even if that’s the case, I still liked it and was glad for the mutual sharing.
(I'm sure the therapist is mindful of the church-state separation issue, which is also very important to me, but she knows Matt is a pastor so she probably feels a little freer (is that right? free-er?) to discuss).
(3) Good and bad: David has been sleeping in Simon’s old toddler bed for about two weeks now. It has actually gone really well; he’s only fallen out a few times and he seems to get a good night’s rest. That’s the good. The bad: thinking about this reminds me of another not-pregnant item: one other thing I can cross off my list is that I no longer have to check the bulletin board at the grocery store, where there was an ad (with little tear-off phone number tabs) for a fixed-side crib. Simon had a 2nd-hand drop-side crib but since he used it they’ve stopped manufacturing them and strongly recommend against using them, so I was hoping to score a good deal on the safer version.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Two Other Good Things
(1) David has begun attending the Mother's Morning Out program at our church, 2 days per week, 4 hours per day. So that's 8 hours per week I automatically get to myself! Oh, and it's good for him to have the interaction and he's doing splendidly thus far. But mostly, I get 8 hours per week to myself! We are paying a local teenage girl, who wants to work with kids with special needs, to be sort of his one-on-one, because he does need some extra help (the general requirement is that the kid be walking). A win-win for everyone. :)
(David asleep on Dad's chest)
(2) David has learned that once his car seat buckles are undone, he still has to wiggle his arms toward midline, before he can get out of the seat. This is a small step but it'll save both of us a few seconds of frustration (him straining to get out with the straps still over his shoulders) each day, so I'm excited.
(David asleep on Dad's chest)
(2) David has learned that once his car seat buckles are undone, he still has to wiggle his arms toward midline, before he can get out of the seat. This is a small step but it'll save both of us a few seconds of frustration (him straining to get out with the straps still over his shoulders) each day, so I'm excited.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Better News ...
There is plenty of happiness in our household, despite the loss described below. Two major things:
(1) My husband is now a fully ordained minister - the ordination service on Saturday was a wonderful experience, one I hadn't had much opportunity to consider the significance of, given the events of the last few weeks. But sitting in the auditorium, the gravity of the moment began creeping up on me. There were lots of family members and folks from our current church, and several from former churches (including Matt's youth leader, from the church he grew up in). It's been a long road, taking more than 10 years: initial ministry inquiry process, seminary, being commissioned, and now finally ordination. We are proud of his hard work and thankful for (all) God's grace and blessings.
(I have just ordered a DVD of the service - I will have to review the sacred moment of the laying on of hands, and the charge by the bishop, because although Simon was as quiet as a mouse David was screaming his head off, so I only caught about 50% of the main thing)
(1) My husband is now a fully ordained minister - the ordination service on Saturday was a wonderful experience, one I hadn't had much opportunity to consider the significance of, given the events of the last few weeks. But sitting in the auditorium, the gravity of the moment began creeping up on me. There were lots of family members and folks from our current church, and several from former churches (including Matt's youth leader, from the church he grew up in). It's been a long road, taking more than 10 years: initial ministry inquiry process, seminary, being commissioned, and now finally ordination. We are proud of his hard work and thankful for (all) God's grace and blessings.
(I have just ordered a DVD of the service - I will have to review the sacred moment of the laying on of hands, and the charge by the bishop, because although Simon was as quiet as a mouse David was screaming his head off, so I only caught about 50% of the main thing)
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